07 November 2010
Hukuya Sushi Bar ~ Japanese/Korean - Eastwood
We venture to into the world of international espionage and Hukuya Sushi Bar, Eastwood, to try their remarkably huge $35 sashimi platter.
Evil genius Davatronics and his nubile accomplice, Katya Von Trapp, have been doing top secret reconnaissance in Eastwood, prior to their trip to Japan over Christmas. On a recent mission they returned barely alive from overeating, with just enough strength to report, in secret code, that they discovered Hukuya Sushi Bar's $35 sashimi platter, so big they could barely eat it. "Better get a gurney," were Von Trapp's last words before lapsing into a pleasure coma.
Davatronics and Von Trapp survived and join us to investigate. Disguised as four greedy Japan-o-philes we enter Hukuya Suhi Bar, a casual and homely little Japanese\Korean joint with counter seats and a few tables.
Hukuya is BYO, Davatronics generously brings Go Shu Blue, fine tasting Australian sake.
We warm up with Katya Von Trapp's favourite, Takoyaki, octopus balls, $8 for 7.
Age Gyoza - 'deep fried dumplings with special sauce' - $7 for 7.
Age Dashi Tofu - 'deep fried been curd with tempura dipping sauce' - $8. 4 Pieces. One of our all time favourite Japanese dishes done well.
Edamame - 'steamed fresh soy beans' - $5. Whoever thought fresh greens could be food porn?
With snackages over we order the main feast, then, stupidly, very stupidly, extremely stupidly, I go outside with Katya Von Trapp for a cigarette. I quit smoking four years ago and the nicotine gives me such a headspin that I'm nauseous, slobbering and wobbly. My face goes a sickly shade of green-white. I have to go for a walk around the block and breathe deeply, the world is turning and I can't even walk straight, I stagger like a digger after Anzac day.
I stumble back to the restaurant, barely alive. In between flashbacks from 'Nam I realise the cigarette was a cunning plan by evil genius Davatronics and his nubile accomplice, Katya Von Trapp, to make me ill. They wanted the $35 Deluxe Sashimi Platter all to themselves. Muhahahaha!!! I'm sure they were stroking a cat in their secret headquarters under a volcano in Seven Hills while concocting this fiendish plan.
But the diabolical scheme fails. I'm weak, I'm green, I can barely speak. I want my mummy. But there's no evil big enough to get in the way of my love for sashimi.
And oh the sashimi.... Big generous hunks of flesh. Plenty of food porn for four folks, and orgy for fish for two. We're coming back for this baby...
Cold soba noodles with dipping sauce $9.
Tempura - 'softly battered prawns and veges served with soy flavoured dipping sauce' - $17.
Spicy octopus - 'marinated octopus with our hot and spicy sauce with veges and rice' - $13.
Kim chi - $2.50.
If you've ever read Anthony Bourdain's 'Kitchen Confidential' you'll get the impression that 'staffies' - ie meals provided for restaurant staff - are borderline lethal, made from toxic kitchen scraps and floor scrapings, mixed together by a first year apprentice with a crack habit and a grudge. Not at Hukuya. The whole restaurant gapes in awe the of staff feast - 'we want what they're having!' To think I used to be ecstatic getting half price Quarter Pounders when I was a kid flipping McBurgers....
We pay the bill, less $35 each for all that food, very happy. My nicotine queasiness is cured by bubble tea at K&J Takeway, a late night Chinese joint. The taro milk tea with pearl is amazing.
Hukya is at Shop 1/25 Railway Parade, Eastwood. Phone 9804 8200. Open Monday - Saturday 11.30am to 9pm. Closed Sundays. K&J Takeway is on the corner at Lakeside Drive, the wonderfully dodgey looking place with some outside tables and the giant chopsticks out front on the footpath.